Wednesday, April 7, 2010

3 Step Solution to Bullying

All kidding aside, if you are ever bullied - DO NOT KILL YOURSELF.

In response to the recent events surrounding who is to blame for the suicide of high school student Phoebe Prince as a result of bullying by her schoolmates, we have come up with a 3 step solution in lieu of taking one's own life:

1. First, buy a pair of brass knuckles. They can be found at most Army/Navy stores OR you can find them online..

2. Next, buy some heavy duty industrial mace. Not that department store shit, I mean the stuff the cops use..

3. Wait until next confrontation with your bully(s). Spray the bully(s) in the face with the mace, (the beauty of the spray is that you can hit several bullies at once very quickly), then hit them repeatedly with the brass knuckles.

This 3 step process will catapult the bully(s) into a whole new reality.

I'm pretty sure the bullying will stop, for at least 3 to 4 weeks while they are recuperating in the hospital. If necessary, visit them in the hospital close to their release and repeat the above 3 steps for even longer lasting results.

Or you could just do what these kids do...

1 comment:

  1. As someone who has been bullied, I can say that all that's going to happen is that the bullies are going to come at you with Mace, brass knuckles, and guns next time. They're very sore losers.