Saturday, March 20, 2010

Massacre at Central High

We began our March signing and promotion tour in South Padre Island...
Spring Break 2010...Think "Girls Gone Wild" meets "Bad Kids Go to Hell" because that is exactly what it was...
As we get on our way from the southern tip of Texas up to the Great White North on our little road trip, we have become a little nostalgic for what has brought us to this we started looking up some youtube videos of trailers of some of our favorite movies...and as we stop in Nashville to do some promoting, we remembered a certain movie that is very inspirational to us...After viewing the trailer you will understand why...
Sure, you knew "Heathers" and "The Breakfast Club" influenced "Bad Kids Go to Hell." But we bet you never saw "Massacre at Central High!" And if you are the baddest!
This is as classic as it appreciate it for all it's worth...or else we may have to whip out a clip of "The Dynamite Girls"...(the precursor to "Thelma & Louise")...

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

More Dynamite Than J.J. Evans!

Okay, so last Friday I was lucky enough to make a midnight screening of "Black Dynamite," at the Inwood Theater in Dallas, Texas.

Although the film has been out on DVD and Blu-Ray for several weeks, the theater seemed like a better way to experience this "bad assss" homage to the blaxploitation films of the 1970’s. The theater was recently refurbished, replacing standard movie theater chairs with couches and beanbags...and by recently, I mean that I was actually able to find for me and my bitches a comfy beanbag that hadn't yet been stained by delicious fruity sodas or other fluids of the night! (How perfect fo' this flick.)

"Black Dynamite" was fan-fuckin-tastic! It knocked out my two front teeth with a roundhouse kick of black fury! From start to finish, this mother fuckin' kung-fu flick never let up on the action or comedy! The constant jump-cuts, the frame penetrating shotgun mic’s, and the characters (Crème Corn, Sweetmeat, and my personal favorite: Tasty Freeze) made this movie feel like an ACTUAL blaxploitation film. And, of course, "Black Dynamite" is filled with memorable dialogue that kind of sticks:

"Fiendish Doctor Wu! You done fucked up now!" and "You diabolical dick shrinkin’ mother fuckers!" just to name a couple that I'll be sure to be repeating for quite some time...and most definitely to be read in some of my future blog postings, when there's just no other way to express what I'm saying.

So, the next day after seeing the movie, I found myself at the rental store trying to find a copy of "Black Dynamite." Sadly, all of the copies had been rented, and I was forced to go home Black Dynamite-less wearing a big frown on my face. (Hopefully, with the success of this movie there might be a sequel to continue the amazing adventure of Black Dynamite).

If you haven’t seen "Black Dynamite" yet, please do so. Once you do, your movie collection will not only grow by 1, but you'll be satisfied knowing that America has been made just that much more bad ass.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Don't Hurt 'Em, Hammer.

Apparently, "The Hurt Locker" is being thrown into the hurt locker for not being so accurate.

Now, let me be clear: The Doors NEVER drove into the desert and dropped acid. There was NO mysterious Mister X that "broke it down" to Jim Garrison about who might have wanted JFK killed. And Jack the Ripper was NOT a member of ANY royal family , (NOR a Freemason) who killed whores in a cover up!

So WHY would you think any EOD team member would ACTUALLY run around Iraq like a cowboy (with wire cutters?!?!) defusing deadly explosives and shit, while putting other team members at risk?

If it's on celluloid, it's just one thing: Entertainment.

And in its defense, a damn good piece of entertainment at that. Please give this movie the Oscar!

And "yes," even the Michael Moore stuff is nothing but entertainment, bitches. They don't ACTUALLY give you guns at a bank.