Thursday, February 25, 2010

When the pupil becomes the master

So Mania has their top 10 list of "COMIC BOOK STORY LINES THAT SHOULD BE TURNED INTO ANIMATED FEATURES" ..

Mania, Mania, Mania...you fellas are selling yourselves (and your list) waaay short...because while I agree that most of the titles & story lines on your list would make great animated features -- I believe numbers 10, 8, and 3 should be used as the basis for the LIVE ACTION films! Especially on the forthcoming revamp of the "Daredevil" film franchise -- AND the dismal story/ plots of the previous "Punisher" and "Silver Surfer" ("Fantastic 4") movies, a shot of adrenaline would help what ails these films. (What the fuck was that last FF4 film about anyway? Saving the planet, or how to make toast?)

I'd gladly see mafia widows thirsty for Frank Castle's blood as opposed to XYZ film actor as the heavy (casting directors, please stop shoving Travolta down our throats - It really AIN'T cool. )...

Give me a clean and understandable S.S. / Galactus story anytime...

AND the days we're living in DEMAND a "Daredevil down on his luck and in financial straights" film. The Kingpin was never so evil as when he played judge, jury and IRS auditor with poor Mr. Murdock.

If only Hollywood were that smart.

Well...then I, uh...guess I wouldn't be bloggin' 'bout this.

Monday, February 22, 2010

That's what I'm talking about, Willis!

Go back to 1986, listen to 'Flock of Seagulls', watch Don Johnson kick ass on Miami Vice.. and actually see MUSIC VIDEOS on MTV!

How many 80's teen, sex romp ski movies can YOU name?

Ah!! Don't think too hard - just go see this film.

If you don't, the terrorists win.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

schools spying on kids at home

thanks to the good people at boingboing for uncovering this week's topic in school news...
brought to you by the not so good people of lower merion school district in pennsylvania who decided that one way to handle their "bad kids" was to have its schools use student laptop webcams to spy on the little bastards not just at school but at their homes as well...
1984?
nope...it's 2010 in the nanny states of america!
oh this cannot be...it's absurd...crazy...ridiculous..there's just no way...
WAY! and it's even worse than you think when you read the actual civil court filing...
"next week on 'to catch a predator' chris hansen surprises 7th grade social studies teacher at home sitting by her computer, sipping on a glass of cabernet, watching her favorite little bad boy get ready for bed..."
this is worse than robot teachers invading the classrooms!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Apparently, bad service can get you killed!

So.. a dude claiming to be a member of the Saudi royal family is being questioned by police on suspicion of murder after one of his servants was found strangled to death at the five-star Landmark Hotel in Marylebone, Central London.

'Royal Dude' told police he was a prince of the Saudi royal family, and was arrested several hours after the discovery of a body at the Landmark Hotel. Royal Dude is believed to have been in London as a tourist and flew around the world accompanied by his aide.

The suspect (Royal Dude) told police he was a cousin of King Abdullah. Following his arrest on Monday evening, police sources said Royal Dude is not covered by diplomatic immunity,

The victim, part of the Royal Dude's entourage, was found dead in a suite by a maid, having suffered severe head injuries in the attack.


Okay, now some FREE advice for all the other royal dudes in Saudi Arabia.. or where ever other royal dudes live.

If your servant, or slave, or whatever.. gets uppity with you, make said servant take off all their clothes and (based on their gender) dance either the 'jiggly weiner dance'.. or (my fave) the 'jiggly boobies dance'. Maybe throw a few cream pies at them while they do this. Maybe even film it, and post the whole dance on YouTube.

BUT NO MATTER WHAT .. DO NOT GET MAD, AND KILL THEM.

What ever happened to an old fashioned spanking?

Saturday, February 13, 2010

chick fights on the rise

I've seen one full on, bare-knuckled 'chick fight' my whole life. (And these were rich WHITE chicks. A very rare bird. Like 'Dodo bird rare', son ! ). Was it hot, you ask? Well, if the girls were hot it mighta been hotter. But they wasn't. Two ugly girls fighting? Much less attractive. Boner shrinker. F-U-G-L-Y. Because we guys are ugly and you girls are pretty, and the allure of a chick fight is that suddenly you've gone medieval on each other. Apparently it's happening more often. I blame all the 'growth hormones' in the food. Over the years, it's made you ladies' boobs bigger (yay), your periods stronger (boo), and your estrogen levels skyrocket (hmm).

I will admit that two hot girls fighting is definitely captivating. But I'm a lover, not a fighter.. therefore, two hot girls 'making up', after a fight? NOW you're talking, Buckwheat. So women, the moral of this blog is: Make love, not war. 'Cause it's hot.

On another note, ladies - learn to head butt - it'll end the fight quick, you won't get a bunch of nasty scratches, and you can get back to your wine cooler.

Girl FIghts Mix - Funny home videos are a click away